give and take

There was a containing-of-two-word saying and that's take-and-give. It was often mentioned on meetings, presentations and discussions. Then people started to argue why “take” was put first instead of “give”. Take and give obviously gave a negative meaning. It’s suggesting ones to take advantages or be served or to beg for others’ kindness first. After that, you can give a hand or advantages to others.

So, now it’s changed to “give and take”. I remember when I was a kid and I did not really bother about what my friends had been doing. As I grow older, which I do not know if I am growing wiser as well or not, I realize that I spent more time with my friends instead of my family. They have been painting my life. They shared experiences, ideas and suggestions to me. They always want me to get the best. They suggested me to choose and even helped me making choices and decisions. Once, there’s a friend in my university who’s always there during my ups and downs. She loved cooking and sharing things. Sometimes when I was running out of money, she often called me to join her lunch or dinner. She’s also a good listener. She could listen to my complaints and troubles for hours. Though we sometimes fought, there’s always turning to be fine. When I could not think, she would find the solution and I voluntarily took the idea and got away with it.
Well, friends come and go. My recent friends have other techniques in helping me out to get the best thing for my self. They asked me questions for me to getting into my own solutions. Coz, they believe that I actually have the solutions already. At the same time, I am now also at the time where I sometimes feel alone yet in the pathetically cheering and fluctuative cheering crowds. I am in the position of being confused on everything and confusing for everyone.

From that point, I decide to go with give and take. I kept talking to occupy people in discussion though I had to repeat the same old stories and dry jokes for many times. I just want them to smile and always feel happy (nonsense isn’t it?!). Smiling and cheering is a couple of examples and signs that you are alive, right?!

“Screaming is a good sign; we need to worry more when people don’t scream when they’re injured” (Basic First Aid Training, 13th December 2006)

I want to keep giving because I have been giving a little and hardly ever give. Once you give, it gives you a great feeling and seems like there’s warm water flowing into your heart and stomach. Once you give, automatically you take or get something though it’s from yourself and that’s the great feeling, warm heart and warm smile on your face.

Empat pokok kekuatan simpati,
- murah hati
- berbicara ramah
- berbuat kebajikan
- memperlakukan semua orang secara sama

Murah hati yang terbaik adalah, murah hati dengan Dhamma.

Berbicara ramah yang terbaik adalah membabarkan Dhamma.

Kebajikan yang terbaik adalah membangun keyakinan ke mereka yang tak percaya.

Perlakuan yang terbaik adalah memperlakukan semua orang secara sama.

Inilah yang dinamakan kekuatan simpati terbaik.

(Anguttara Nikaya IV, 62)

Om Ma Ni Pad Me Hum – for my Maya and a bunch of thanks to Tanti for the birthday e-card. I really wish that I could give more because I love the sensation after that.